I wake up every morning and do the best I can. Some days are better than others; some days I feel I am barely surviving or holding it together. With a household to manage, five sons to keep up with, a husband, a job, two adult daughters, two dogs and Diabetes plopped right in the middle of it, some days I feel I’m doing good to just be upright.
With all those people to manage, one would think the laundry, grocery shopping, and housework alone would be enough to keep me in stellar shape. Unfortunately, it’s not. So, one thing I do spend energy on is fitness. It’s important to me in order to be healthy, feel good, work out stress and look good for my husband. Honestly, since Diabetes climbed aboard, I’ve been struggling somewhat as after some of those long nights managing high or low sugars, all I want to do is climb back in bed. And, the generalized fatigue makes it hard to motivate myself to go run 2 or 3 miles after working 12 hours. My bed beckons.
I was at my peak in 2010.
I pimped my husband out to pay for a trainer; he’s got mad skills. I focused on my diet. I ate more protein, more grass clippings, less Corona. I put in the time at the gym as I should. It was for a selfish reason. My husband and I were spending our 10th anniversary on the beach, and I wanted “those” awesome beach bikini pics. I’d never had them. I got them! I felt amazing. My cholesterol was fantastic. (Exercise and seaweed will do that for you!) Coolness!
I planned to keep it up. Immediately after the trip, I had a “friend” sucker punch me. That really knocked me to my knees for a bit. Then, I fell and broke my arm. Set-backs. Once the arm healed, I was back on board for a good 8 months or so before Diabetes jumped on board. That meant my focus became being a pancreas and working like a slave to pay for it all! Being told your baby has a chronic incurable disease could knock the Incredible Hulk down. Learning to manage it all diverted my attention. Being told both of your babies have an incurable disease is enough to make Hercules’ knees buckle. Needless to say, something had to give.
I kept up with my gym routine as best I could, but it wasn’t the same. It’s really hard to manage it all with THAT beast on your back! However, now, I’m back on track. Working hard to make it right again. I use that bikini pic as my motivation, what I want to achieve again. Granted, I’m not bad right now, but I’m not that good! I maintain my weight in a 10-lb range, which is just over the weight at which I graduated high school. I make my weekly gym plans, weekly goals, and longer term goals. Sometimes my goal is a body fat percentage. Sometimes it’s a certain weight or measurement by a certain date. Sometimes my goal is determined by some life event (wedding, Bon Jovi, vacation), and sometimes it’s just “get your fat ass to the gym like you’re supposed to”! Some weeks I get in there three times and add extra cardio sessions outside of the gym. Some weeks I only make it twice. Some weeks I miss all together. Life can get in the way, and being a Mommy and a pancreas comes first, but I try my hardest.
Despite what I think is failure or weakness on my part, I’ve still somehow managed to inspire someone who’s great herself! Natalie is a high school friend, always a sweet and funny soul. She lives in LA and is a fitness trainer! ME? I inspired a fitness trainer?! Come ON! I posted my awesome bikini photos online after that trip, and when Natalie complimented them, my head swelled! SHE looks fantastic and SHE said I looked like a fitness model. Really, her comment trumped all others!
I think I have a lot of room for work, but I’ll take the compliment. Frankly, this ego boost came at a great time, and also serves to motivate me to keep on keepin’ on! Read what she has to say here! Thanks, Natalie, for your inspiration!
I guess in this life, you never know who is watching, who takes notice, or who is inspired because of you! I hope I can get my already giant head through the door now!