Maybe a little Random
It’s been almost a month since I’ve blogged. It’s not for any shortage of ideas, but more because life gets in the way. Kids started school. Getting insulin levels adjusted for school routine. Boy turned 16. Endocrinology appointments. Pediatric appointments. Football practice and games. Drivers’ Ed. Working. And, I’ve been focusing a lot of energy on fundraising for our 2013 JDRF Walk to Cure Diabetes Team. On occasion, I take the chance to sleep.
It’s been 18 months now since Diabetes plopped his big fat butt in our lives uninvited. As I sit and think, I list the things that Diabetes has taught me in the past 18 months.
1. I’ve learned not to brag. As soon as I gloat, feel proud, or brag, Diabetes kicks back and reminds me who is boss.
2. I’ve learned to be patient. Yes, I’ve broken down in tears due to disappointment. I’ve cried due to extreme fatigue and frustration. I’ve been downright pissed about having to buy stupid stuff that I’d never buy ordinarily. Now, I try to just shake my head at the stupidity of this disease because getting upset and angry doesn’t change anything or take it away.
3. I’ve learned to take nothing for granted. Most notably, the lives of these two precious little boys. In another day and time, they’d be dead. That’s a harsh and humbling thought. Even when they’re driving me nuts, I’m so glad they’re alive and with their Mommy and Daddy. Too many parents can’t say the same thing.
4. I’ve learned to think about one problem from multiple angles. I’ve already done this in my nursing career, but you don’t realize how many different reasons for a crazy glucose level there could be. Once you think you pinpoint the problem, it’s easier to correct. Did I count the carbs accurately? Was he active? What does his insulin pump look like? Is he getting too much basal insulin? Too much bolus insulin? Is he getting sick? Did he have a lot of fat or protein? Not enough protein? Does this site absorb better? Is the insulin good/bad? Was I holding my mouth right? Any of these can impact a blood sugar level. Sometimes, nothing makes sense.
5. I’ll never stop learning, being surprised, or being baffled.
6. My boys are WAY smarter than even I imagined, and they get it. I explain on their level (and maybe even above their level), and they go with it and seem to understand.
7. I’ve learned to approach people with heart to ask an uncomfortable question…asking for money. Frankly, I’m independent and stubborn to the point of it being a fault, and I’d rather chew nails than ask someone for money. But, I’ve gotta do what I’ve gotta do.
As I mentioned, I’ve been spending a lot of time and energy fundraising for our Walk Team. If I could just write a check myself, I’d do it, and give JDRF all the money they need to find a cure for my boys. If the amount of tears I have cried (and other D-parents) could cure this disease, not only would my boys be cured but all other Type One Diabetics would, too! If sheer willpower was strong enough to make those beta cells work again, T1D would be eradicated. Unfortunately, that’s not enough.
When my boys were diagnosed in 2012, I literally felt like my heart was ripped open and the breath was kicked out of me. It was humbling to know that I could not do my #1 Mommy job…fix the problem. Once I caught my breath, I decided to do what I COULD do, which is help those who CAN fix this problem. So, I’m working hard on thinking outside the box. I’m asking a lot of people in a lot of different ways to donate to help JDRF find better treatments and a cure. I’m finding ways that people “get something” back for their donations. I’m hoping to have a hugely successful team and raise lots of money for JDRF. Besides provide the best care I can for my boys, it’s all I can do to fix the problem.
So, if my perpetual asking, reminding, or discussing the topic is wearing on you…ask yourself…What Would You Do? How would you respond if someone told you your baby had an incurable disease, but a cure is on the horizon? And, know that the way it wears on you is only a fraction of the amount of wear and tear this disease wreaks on my boys’ bodies and this Mommy’s heart.
So, I’ll ask again. Support our team today!